Remember who you are.

And I say that with great positivity and sincerity. Elem has been going through some very "intense" mood swings lately, which is to be expected with a 2-almost 3 year old. So I have no problems with that. However, when the mood is towards the south end and on the not so friendly side, it can really put a damper on your day. Not to mention all the others around you. We have been working so hard to find a combination of discipline, reward, and punishment, to fit our very smart little 2 year old, and it has been really tough for us! For now we stick to a strict warning when Elem is not listening, or not obeying, or talking ugly to someone, hitting, taking toys, etc. After the warning comes time out-and with time out usually comes a large amount of screaming. Here are the stages of time out as we see it: Disobedience, anger, sadness, begging for forgiveness (or bargaining), and then the need for empathy, and then apology. After that very lengthy list of events, everything pretty much settles down and the time out is completed. Lately though it seems that getting him to actually GO to timeout has been so much more difficult, because he is so much smarter and knows that he doesn't really have to sit there, because he is strong and he can get up and he knows it! he knows how to push our buttons with his comments when he is in time out and he knows what really gets under my skin. Imagine that? hmm. haha. So I new something had to change and I thought long and hard about what I could "say" or "do" to change the overall feel of doing something wrong and being disciplined rather than punished with every single "not so perfect" thing he does throughout the day! I know I am a little overboard with everything, but I am trying to raise the perfect little, amazingly brilliant, gentleman here people! And by golly I will give it 150%! Even if he doesnt want me too. :) So in thinking, earlier this week, I heard myself, responding to one of his not so favorable actions with...

Elem, remember who you are. Remember how Elem acts. Elem is good and kind to his friends. Remember who you are. I know you can do it.

And wouldnt you know that he totally listened to me!!!!!!!! He stopped what he was doing, although it took him a second to think about what the best choice was, and he listened to me. He even walked himself to time out that first time. And has since just stopped that behavior that I was directing the comment towards. And to top it all off, given hugs and apologies to those he hurt or was unkind to! I am not sure how long this will work, but it appears that instead of speaking negatively about what he is doing that I do not approve of, and changing it around to where it is almost like he has a choice to stop the decisions that he is making and MAKE that choice to be good or to listen, he is really way more receptive to. Yay! There are not too many times as a parent that you actually feel a slight moment of accomplishment with your child, because it seems like there is always something that you need to do better or you need to teach your child! But in that moment, and for now, I really feel happy about the way we have chosen to parent and the way he has chosen to respond. I just could not be more proud of my little man.

Since the adjustment of the terminology :), it seems that Elem has grown by leaps and bounds, and I am just amazed. I know it seems silly, but I just LOVE to see Elem being good, and acting the way I know he can, but just choosing the kind way over the bulling way. Ahhh, a sense of satisfaction. Amazing what a little positive motivation, and positive vibes can do for not only your kid but your whole family. I really going to try and shift from "punishing" Elem to "disciplining" in the most positive way I can. Once that doesn't work f course I will revert back to the good ole time out corner, but until then-Remember who you are-is the golden rule around this house!